I could have been cool

Ok, blog, here’s my middle school story that I was recently reminded of when someone asked me what I would do if I could turn back time.

First, you’ll have to understand that I was quite a dweeby little asian boy. Surprising, I know. I was smaller than my peers, had rather dorky large glasses, and definitely had your stereotypical nerdy asian boy thing going on. In physical activities, I did alright when I was up against my own weight (running, pull ups, etc.) but not so hot when pitted against others (tackling).

So one day in my PE class, we’re playing flag football. Sometimes, devious kids would try to tie their belt around their waist so that it would be hard to pull off. I wouldn’t do that, but since I was so small, the belts were usually too large for me and one end would hang down really low, so I’d take the end and tuck it into the belt around my waist so it wouldn’t swing wildly as I ran.

My PE coach was all-time quarterback and for some reason on the last play of the game, he throws the ball to me. I somehow catch the ball! Amazing! I start running towards the end zone and weave my way around multiple defenders who were probably in a state of shock that I even caught the ball. I was fairly zippy once I get going so I actually make it to the end zone. Touchdown! I was so proud of myself! That was rather short-lived, however, as some kid quickly runs over to me and yanks pretty hard on one of my flags. I expected it to just fall off, but he apparently yanked quickly enough where the end that I had tucked in created a knot so the belt “tied itself” and he basically lifted me up a short distance by my belt. Oh no! Everyone thinks I cheated now! Shame!

So that’s how I failed to secure glory for the nerds and instead was awarded shame upon my family for cheating at flag football. If I could turn back time, I would figure out a different way to tuck in that belt. I’m pretty sure I would have been king middle school once news of my victorious run made its way through the grapevine, but alas…